Last night, i went to Rosallie... always wanted to go there with the 3 masketeers but i was always bz with studying. It was quite a fee i must say. Cannot go there very often. Big(Da) S was so kind to bring me there to check the place out. Sad that the theme was kinda obscene. One of nudity (censored). But nonetheless... it didn't spoil the atmosphere. Its always nice to hang out with Da S. She brought up some stuff for me to think about. Like my time from now till... my parents arrive. Honestly, i haven't started packing yet. Wonder just how much of my heart is willing to go.
Time kinda disrupted becoz of G. I would have done things SOOooOOo much more differently without G. Indeed, a relationship requires a humongeous amount of sacrifice of time. I laid it all on the table before him... and i told him my choice. Not really sure how much he sees that i put into this. Just hope that he appreciates it. Don't require him to do anything special or unique for me. Just hope that he'll serve God, and grow to be more and more like Jesus, be a God fearing man is all i ask. After all, at the end of each day, its all about God and not about us. Is he a hinderance or does he motivate me to be a better person? Hmm... i dare not comment too much. But one thing i know is that he has taught me to love, kind, forgiveness and generosity. Always encouraging me to be more of a lady. Through our communication, he has shown me my weakness as well... impatieness... probably one of the source of the many hostile and emotional statements i make. I just wished i had more time for the others.... i wish to spend more time with the rest. ANymore coffee outings anyone? At my place? I whip up something?
Finally, today he finishes his last paper. Looking at the time right now, 10:46am, he has already completed his maths paper and i'm sure that he's now looking through his slides for IT. He really needs to have a better method on how to go about revising for his exams. Any gd study methods, please feel free to let him know (if you know him), or blog about it.
Gonna continue to look out for jobs on the internet. Father please lead me to this job if it is your will.
This morning hasn't been totally great. I had 3 nightmares of which, i can only remember two. One of them was that... i actually flunk my Chinese paper and i JUST made it for my corporate finance. Haha.. funny... i'm not taking any CHinese exam. But i was really upset to know that i FAILED one paper!!! And hey! My HUA YU is not all that bad! The other nightmare is kinda personally, involved me, G and my Dad.
*sigh* what's the point in fretting right now? SOmetimes i wish i could do so much more than praying.. but ya... what to do? Pray.... .... ....
Just praying for my parents heart to be ready for their trip here as well. Lately my mom has been quite edgy. Not sure why, but i seem to always be having some kind of heated conversation with her. It always involves one thing. My own preference and over what SHE feels is good and right. Everyone deserves to choose what they like don't they? Sigh... i wish she could be more encouraging and supportive in what i do. *sobs* always hurt to end a conversation like that, becoz deep down inside, i don't want to be seen as being disobedient or disrespectful. I still love her very much, but why should it be at the expense of my freedom to choose and decide what is best for myself?
Comfort for the day, i am never alone. Watched Oprah the other day and it featured this lady and daughter who couldn't get along with each other. They both wanted to scratch each other... perhaps what i lack is patience and understanding eh?
*Linda breathes*
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