Goodbye 2014

Year 2014 is coming to an end and a time for reflection.

This year has seen changes such as my superior leaving and me taking on additional roles.
I have taken a month off in Dec to look for a new job.

I hope to get one by 2015 and steer towards a brighter future with opportunities and ability to balance both work and life. Jonas is going to start pre-school in Year 2015 and our house is expected to be ready in the same year. 2015 is going to be a year of adjustments for everyone.  

My resolution includes to stop being angry at minute things that i cannot change. Example, G, spending too much time watching movies and playing games. Or peepz at work choosing to be lazy and unproductive. To be honest i get discouraged and in little moments have chosen to give up. I’d like to change that for year 2015. God has been placed at the backseat too many times and I’d like to give him the driving wheel. Friend R shared an article on which i relish, believing that we start by being faithful in the little things before the big things. Where does my improvement start? It starts tml morning.

1)      Choosing to wake up with a longing to read God’s word

2)      Eating breakfast right, getting that workout the body needs,

3)      and then leaving the house positive and face the challenges ahead.

I think the start is important as it can help to set the mind and body in the right direction for the day.

Ending with

1)      A good meal

2)      Spending time with Jonas and the Lord

3)      Resting early for the day (not spending wasteful time on Korean drama/shows)

I am hopeful for 2015. I pray you will be too.

40 day - Summary and important lessons to learn

It's hard to face life. 
Life is not a stroll in the park. 
The world will never be perfect. 
There is a new issue everyday, temptation lurking at every corner. 

But once again God found me when i was losing it. 
There is something that draws me back to Him all the time. 
Like an invisible line, always connected to Him. 
Never letting me go. 

My sister helped me grab a copy of the 40 Day booklet Jubilee Moment on which i highlighted many points which had me convicted and i would like to share it here. 

Special thanks to my in-laws who took care of J while i was in bed reading and reading and trying to rid myself of disgraceful thoughts.  

Pointer 1: 
Bar Mitzvah - literally a son of the commandment when a Jewish boy becomes a man and accepts personal responsibility to live under God's Law. 

But Jesus didn't wait till the Bar Mitzvah moment. He accepted it when He was twelve. Missing for 3 days His parents found Him In the temple listening and asking teachers questions. 

Is that possible in today's world? For a child to be intensely curious, weaned from the world and totlally consumed with zeal for the things of the Father and vision for the world. 

As a parent, has my parenting style hindered J from experiencing God? Overly concerned with snagging that coveted place? Tuition, enrichment classes for a head-start? 

The anxiety is pervasive and jeopardise the well-being of our young. 
To stop being conniving and to pray that i give my child back to you. 
Their future is in Your hands and teach me to rest in you, serving them in quiet confidence and trust. 

Pointer 2: 
The most critical skill a leader needs to have is the capacity to lead change. 
In the past mass production was unthinkable. Potter moulds each clay individually. While there were crowds of people vying for His attention, Jesus gave greater attention to spiritual formation of His disciples. SPending personal time with them that left a lasting impression. 

Pointer 3: 
Jesus was led into the wilderness to be temppted. Why did God allow it? 
-
 Jesus had a mission as a Messiah. 
 He was to destroy the works of Satan by the Word of God. 

- He might learn obedience. 
Hebrews 5:8-9 Although he was a son, he learned obedience through what he suffered. And being made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation to all who obey him. 

- Jesus to exchange places with us. 
 To experience what we experience and yet come out of it victorious as our saviour. 

 Pointer 4:
 Temptation to be relevant.
We bend over backwards in the name of relevance.
We have misunderstood the meaning of relevance. Compromising the Gospel.
What is kingdom and costly, we filter out as too radical.

- Lose my Job for telling the truth?
- Liquidate investment to prosper the poor? ... etc.

This is kingdom and costly.

There is a flawed notion that to win the world we must look like the world, act like the word, sound like the world and smell like the world.

Noises of this world are seemingly getting louder.
Local celebraties, bloggers, Korean stars are all about getting plastic surgery, fillers, nose job... and the list goes on.  

 God's World is timeless and timely based on truth, not the mood of our times.

 Pointer 5:
Temptation to be spectacular
Satan tempted Jesus to throw himseld off the pinnacle of the temple.

Signs and wonder have their place. But only on God's term and timing.
Faith demands no  proof.

Calculate the time and money we spend to attract and impress the crowds.
Am i walking on a tight rope to impress my superiors, sheeps, friends and fans, pastors/youth leaders. We draw attention to ourselves, to prove ou worth and project our image.

Have mercy on us and forgive us. Take down our towers and undo the tight rope.

Yet supernatural has a central place for miracles to relieve human suffering, point people to Jesus and serve God's mission. Let's earnestly desire the greater gifts of the Spirit.


Pointer 6:
Temptation to be powerful.

It's so much easier to tighten the screws and control people with flowchars, tiimelines and salary scales than it is to lead them by loving them,serving them and suffering for them as Jesus did.

We have often used money, power system and policies to control others.

What makes power irresitible? Maybe it is that power offers and easy subsitute for the hard task of love. It seems easier to becontrol than to love people. Easier to own life than to live life.


When we start being too impressed by the results of our work, we slowly come to the erroneous conviction that life is one large scoreboard where someone is listing the points to measure our worth.

- We are intelligent because someone gives us a high grade
- We are helpful because someone says thanks
- We are likeable because someone likes us
- We are important because someone thinks we are indispensable

In short, we are worthwhile because we have successes

Lord help us to think our accomplishments as our self esteem.

it hasnt been the best of weeks. last week was suppose to be awesome. We finally brought J to SEA Aquarium. I was supposedly on leave till Friday but was called back on Thursday. I get frustrated at work. What is the cause you may ask. Well several factors. My superior resigned.. and there are loads of projects due this year. It doesn't get better as my other colleague is constantly unfit to even turn up for work. It might sound like i am petty but i have been covering her like this for 4 + years and frankly speaking it feels like i am taken advantage of. A dustbin... but a very important one i must say. Indispensible that they are persuading me to stay but yet unwilling to offer a better rate. Dangle the carrot and i might just take the bait... have been trying to pray about it but just can't meditate or remain in still. Personally i want to move on. Something new, peaceful and a place where pple just takes care of their own responsibilities. But that would be all seem too perfect... To Do List includes Looking to God first. Pray and pray. cutting down korean shows Getting back in exercise regime Earing better sending my resume out. Drafting my journey Crafting my career path. Reminder to self. I need to do better, even better than before... not because of added responsobilities but because i am now a mother. A God given position whicj is blessed.respbboni