Today, i had this weird dream. It is the SAME location... and i've been in this dream (same location) for 6 times already! CAn you believe it? There is another location which i dreamt of for 4 times already. I have not been to either location before... and both brings about a eerie feeling. I woke up feeling upset. Glad that i slept... but disturbed by the dream. It's like a island with this humongous roller coaster... and i'm with someone... and... we just go up higher and higher... and there's no turning back... and when the roller coaster went down, i flung out of it... flew across the huge sea... and landed in a swimming pool. I dunno how to describe it. 6 times already... the other location is even more eerie... there's a temple... and someone chasing me... don't want to go into details... but its a nightmare...
So i have had demonic dreams...but in each fierce spritual battle, God has won the victory. AMEN! If not i wouldn't be alive today... ... I remember my first encounter... i was so traumatised... but it was only then did i know the power of the Lord... did i only totally graps how powerful is the blood of Jesus Christ... It is undenialable that indeed there is a spiritual war going on... yet, i can be so slack in my prayer... O Lord... open the eyes of my heart... that i will know and take my prayers to the next level with you. (Interested to know in detail... must ask me).
Alittle insight into sth that happened yst... erm... i went to 3monkey (place to hangout with friends) with 2 aunties... it felt weird... coz they were touching on a very sensitive topic... and in situations as such i rather be silent... not that i don't have my own tots or expectations, but i found it alittle too personal. Not very comfortable sharing at that point of time.. so i was very silent throughout. However, it was interesting to hear their views... some of which was very similar to what my mom will repeatedly tell me. Topics such as expectations of future husbands were raised... my first encounter with aunties... abit freaky.. coz it was like an insight to how it will feel if i'm still single in like maybe 3 years time? AHHHhhHH...
Sometimes i conceal how i think or how i feel... just to protect myself. Maybe i know that if i'm forced to reveal sth.. i will end up telling a lie... so might as well zip up!
It is hard to be true to yourself... it is hard... sometimes i think myself of being someone else... and i end up being someone else instead of myself... i end up lying to myself. IT is possible to wear a mask and fool the world... but i know i cannot fool my heart.
Everyone is returning back from their home country. I'm looking forward to their return. Time flies... i can't bear to see friends who have graduated leave... i'll miss you all so so soOOoo very much... *heart breaks*
Another semester coming up... another mental and emotional battle to conquer... battle is not mine alone but God's as well.
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