Tears are unavoidable... they just flow automatically... and my uncertainty of things just increases by the minute... my face and expressions refuses to reveal my inner most feelings... they just give everything away. No... i must be strong... the tears must stop. But i cant help feeling the way i'm feeling without friends and so many cost to face alone.
This sounds pathetic... sounds like a typcial case of someone trying to cope with cultural shock. So it is.... it has only been my first day... how to live like normal. My values don't seem to sink in with the environment. I refuse to let anything change the values God has set before me. Liberal or watever... my stand remains the same... NO i cannot be laid back... take everything easy going..take everything for granted... heehee haha... no... Singapore is not like that... everything is time... efficiency. Time waits for no man. I take that as my motto.
I need alot of friends here...
Gonna need them to talk with, play with, motivate and encourage each other... so far.. i cant say i have any... i feel like i'm starting a whole new life... without a history of my own. I feel a lost of identity... the me in Singapore i love and miss so dearly... where i can freely walk on the streets without fear of lost. It's different over here... tat's all i can say. I cannot do alot of things i wanna do as i did in the past... i wanna run and hide for awhile. this reality is too harsh for me to bear alone. I need help... but is help along the way? Where is help to be found.... where?
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